I lay there on the ground, thinking that this would surely pass. A little rub of deep heat on the pain might sort it out. But I couldn’t move. I couldn’t straighten my back out and I certainly couldn’t weight bear enough to walk. I could only crawl.
So, there I was, ten o’clock on boxing day morning, crawling on all fours towards my bedroom to retrieve my phone. I waited for a while, hoping that it would pass, but forty minutes later, I still couldn’t move. I couldn’t straighten my back.
My anxious mind started to play tricks with me.
Maybe you’ll be paralysed forever.
Perhaps this is it. Perhaps your time is up.
Oh dear, well you did have good innings.
* I can be a bit of a drama queen, can you tell?
I phoned my sister. Luckily, she is a care assistant. Luckier still, she was at work and sitting next to a nurse. She put the nurse on the phone to me.
“Can you move your toes?”
“Yes.”
“Your legs?”
“Yes.”
“Your arms?”
“Yes.”
Oh good, perhaps I was just a major drama queen after all and this was nothing.
“But you can’t stand up and you can’t weight bear?”
“No.”
“You’re going to have to phone an ambulance.”
Oh no, really? I didn’t want to waste the ambulance time. And I didn’t want to spend a day in hospital. I had editing to do; work I wanted to get on with.
“Yes, you’re going to have to. They’ll assess you. Can you crawl to the front door to let them in okay?”
What a fabulous boxing day morning. Crawling to the front door to enable access for the paramedics.
No sooner was I off the phone to my sister, than she sent a text two minutes later: I’m on my way up x
Bless her. She was going to clock off work and take the time to drive half an hour up the road to help me.
She arrived in and saw me lying on the floor.
“Awk Rose…” her face was full of sympathy. Immediately she clicked into care assistant mode, putting a pillow under my head and fussing gently around me.
When she got off the 999 call, she said, “Right, a paramedic will be phoning you back soon. They need to determine what kind of chair to carry you out in. And you’re not allowed to eat or drink anything.”
Oh jeepers, I thought. The neighbours will be all agog. A big bulky ambulance rocking up in our quiet cul-de-sac on a lazy Boxing day morning. They’d all assume I was on the drink on Christmas day.
“And I need to put the outside light on for them so they can find us okay.” She was all biz, whizzing around the place, full of life and vitality. She whipped out a piece of paper and a pen. “Now the cats, what food do they need?”